Becoming a Social Media and Business Guru

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Want to be social media or business Guru, selling SEO services and dreams of being a multi-millionaire with secrets to social media and business insider knowledge? No experience, No achievements, No credentials, No unpleasant learning required. All you have to do is be positive and fake it until you make it.

Establish a large number of followers

Establishing worth while followers takes time, skill, quality content, engagement and lots of hard work. No time or need for reading my own co-oped content. Any want to be social media Guru or Business Coach can just purchase followers and likes for a steal $300 for 5000 followers no problem. Why not go next level and spend a grand and get 40,000 followers. Guru land here we come!

Develop a website

having a well planed and thought out website makes a great first impression, but a Business coach or SEO services template for $59 from template monster will do the trick. In a couple hours you can be a pro, just swap your detail... or most of them and you are all go.

  • Get your website SEO optimized - Why bother, you'll learn how to actually put that in practice later. After all plenty of time to learn how to actually do this stuff when your reach from re-branding other peoples sales pitches.
  • Adopt a mobile-first design strategy and ensure that the website fits well in all screen sizes - Whats that, doesn't sound important.
  • Include share buttons and links to all social media profiles on the home page - Note by more likes and followers for other services with first customers advanced payment.
  • Optimize the website for speed - No drug taking here this is all natural SEO, marketing, business Guru service...thank you very much.

    Be consistent with content marketing

    If you want to be an SEO guru it is very important to copy and paste from the same source of actual experts. That way you capture the good message and keep the same consistent style in your posts.

    Make sure only to ever use the content posted by others never ever have an original idea. Most importantly never read an actual book or create any real experience. Using short 5 minute youtube videos is much better. It'll leave a lot more time to photoshop yourself in front of planes and other peoples expensive cars, until you get your own.

    Host webinars or live events

    Hosting webinars is an ideal means to marketing your social media management services. Live events are out! Only ever do solo videos outside exotic locations. No need for any planning or effort, rough and rambling is good enough.

    Promote your events on Facebook being sure not to offer anything of substance so you are not found out.

    Important tips

  • Never ever offer anything of substance. The last thing you want is a client being able to test and measure anything you do. Just keep smiling, talking fast like your important and remember to repeat the same thing over and over.

  • Try to avoid any reference to your own marketing or material at all costs.

  • Don't ever let anyone analysis your posts or users otherwise they will find plagiarism, straight copying and absolutely zero engagement.

  • Always avoid explaining why you have hundreds of posts by no comments.


    In all seriousness there are a lot of fake it until you make it so called SEO/marketing/business Gurus around. Very very few have ever done anything more than set up the business of being a GURU, and many poorly. Be very wary of anyone calling themselves a so called expert. Literally anyone with a couple hundred dollars can setup a shell of a business and promote them selves as an expert.

    Things to look for are:

  • Independent reviews/sources
  • Quality of engagement in their own SEO work
  • Ranking of their own business (If your the best surely your business will rank at least well)
  • Length of time in business
  • Acclaim from other credible sources.
  • Portfolio of work, not just the brands they worked with. Being a Janitor at Coke Cola and being the CMO are completely different, but they both worked of Coke.

    Tell us your thoughts or experiences with these so called gurus and experts in the comment section below. Your experiences good or bad will likely help others from being ripped off.

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    Guest Freelance Content Writer for His focus also revolves around Link Earning, SEO and SMO. He enjoys watching anything from action movies to documentaries apart from reading & writing.
    Sydney, Australia Website